: Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC, the European
: Parliament has commissioned a feasability study in ways of improving
: efficiency in communications between Government departments.
: 
: European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is
: unnecessary difficult; for example: cough, plough, rough, through and
: thorough. What is clearly needed is a phased programme of changes to iron
: out these anomalies. The programme would, of course, be administered by a
: committee staff at top level by participating nations.
: 
: In the first year, for example, the committee would suggest using 's'
: instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities would
: resieve this news with joy. Then the hard 'c' could be replaced by 'k'
: sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear up
: konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters kould be made
: with one less letter.
: 
: There would be growing enthousiasm when in the sekond year, it was anounsed
: that the troublesome 'ph' would henseforth be written 'f'.  This would make
: words like 'fotograf' twenty per sent shorter in print.
: 
: In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
: reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments
: would enkourage the removal of double letters which have always been a
: deterent to akurate speling.
: 
: We would al agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the languag is
: disgrasful. Therefor we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ as
: though nothing had hapend. By this tim it would be four years sins the skem
: began and peopl would be reseptive to steps sutsh as replasing 'th' by 'z'.
: Perhaps zen ze funktion of 'w' kould be taken on by 'v', vitsh is, after
: al, half a 'w'. Shortly after zis, ze unesesary 'o kould be dropd from
: words kontaining 'ou'. Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer
: kombinations of leters.
: 
: Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl
: riten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, difikultis and
: evrivun vud fin it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drems of the Guvermnt vud
: finali hav kum tru.
: 

so simpool !!!