Subject: the schitt family (R-rated)

It has come to our attention that many customers, when questioned on
various areas of system operation, have responded 'I don't know Jack
Schitt'! This post will remedy that situation.

Jack Schitt is the only son of Awh Schitt, the fertilizer magnate,
who's married to Oh Schitt, the owner of Kneedeep Schitt Inn. Jack
Schitt married Noe Schitt. They produced seven children. Their first
son, Big Schitt was followed by twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt,
then by three daughters: Im Schitt , Fulla Schitt , And GivaSchitt,
and finally another son, Bull Schitt. Big Schitt manages a public
relations establishment called the Schitt House which is visited often
by our computer users.

Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout.
Deep Schitt and  Dumb Schitt now publish a newsletter named the Schitt
List that recognize our users for their various actions on the bbs's.
Users are urged to check the Schitt List often, as it is updated daily
and may contain their name. Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt and they
have a son, Chicken Schitt.

Dip Schitt operates a warez bbs called Good Schitt.
Breaking tradition, IM Schitt married Save Faced.  IM Schitt-Faced is
now the director of the local drug and alcohol rehab program.  Fulla
Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens brothers. The
Schitt-Happens children are named Dawg Schitt ,  Bird Schitt , and
Horse Schitt.  The Shitt-Happens own a consulting firm used
exclusively by this bbs.  When problems happen, Shitt-Happens is an
appropiate response. Bull Schitt just married a real spicy number,
Pisa Shitt, and they are proudly awaiting the arrival of Baby Schitt. 
Bull Shitt is consulted by this bbs on financial matters and has input
on how to run a bbs for profit.

 ....And now you know Jack Schitt.